Have you ever wondered if your kid is a bully? The poor display of attitude and the exhibition of resentful behavior might have kept you up at night, but have you ever wondered what made your child that way? Even if you have good intentions, you might have done something unintentionally; and it’s never too late to watch yourself and become better for raising decent kids.
Children learn and copy your actions, just like a parrot famously does. If you want to raise a rude human, you better start acting like it and get one. Many parents have seen a reflection of themselves in their kids when their kid might have treated the waiter serving them extremely unkindly.
This should be a real eye-opener for parents, and they should realize how they are raising a kid to be a future bully when the kid doesn’t know the basic concept of kindness. To become a better parent, you should keep your unkind opinions to yourselves and control what you say, especially in front of their kids.
Not Displaying Affection or Care
Most relationships often face their downfall after a kid enters into the picture. Why is that? You love your family, then where does the problem lie? The issue lies in you not being affectionate enough. I know that simple acts of intimacy with your loved ones can make a huge difference.
You can hug your family or drop a kiss on their cheeks while leaving for work, and you will see your kids excited to see you again. Life is too short of telling your loved ones you adore them with any conditions attached, so practice saying it to your kids.
It’s a common fear among parents that their kid will end up as a failure if they don’t take part in every extra-curricular activity out there, hoping that one of them might ignite their passion. Do you not see the problem here? You are giving your child a full-schedule, which is preventing them from being a child.
Children are meant to play, make mistakes, and have unlimited free time on their hands. If you put so much pressure on them, then they might just become stressed and feel powerless. If your child becomes stressed, this further leads to anxiety, aggression, and more that encourages your child to become a bully.
I am often amazed at the kids who share their stuff, such as toys, food, or anything. This is because I know the effort that making your child learns the essential skill is extremely tough. Sharing is something that the child must do naturally and of their own will.
If you snatch your kid’s favorite toy to hand it to another child, your child will look for ways to regain back the lost power, leading to bullying. Show your kids how to share by offering them food or lending something they want to explore. You will see the change yourself.
Not Teaching Basic Respect
We live in a world with different people, and it’s important to respect everyone’s choices to live peacefully. Teaching your child this should be a priority. I have seen many curious children when they see unique people and ask their parents about them.
Know that basic teaching respect for your child starts at home. Your child does not have to like everyone they meet, but you should ensure that they don’t bully people for being themselves. You might want to watch yourself too. If you judge others and pass abusive comments on people’s appearances, your child might be encouraged to do the same.
Not taking an interest in Your Child’s Life
I have seen many parents working extremely hard to give their kids the life they deserve but rarely giving them the time of their day. Even though it’s a simple concept, people still don’t have the hang of it.
Know what kind of company they keep, are they hanging out with bullies? What’s happening in their life, how was their day? The point is that if you fail to do the bare minimum and only dictate your child about what to do and what not to do, then you aren’t listening. Your child needs you, and it’s time you step up to fulfill that role.
Not Allowing Your Kids To Be Themselves
I know people who have destroyed their kid’s mental peace just by imposing things on them. Never be that kind of parent. Children are bound to make mistakes and should be given the freedom to do so. They will throw tantrums, create messes, break the rules, and so much more.
All you need to do as a parent is to let them exist and provide guidance when needed. Stop correcting and dictating every part of their life to feel not having any role to play in their lives. This exact thing causes them to feel helpless, leading to them bullying other people to regain that loss of power.
Forgetting That They Are Still Kids
We all are aware that we live in a very competitive world and that even children happen to be mature for their age. This does not mean that parents forget that they are still kids. As adults, we should know from our experience how difficult managing everything was, including the stress that came with it.
Disclosing family issues, medical illnesses, or financial incompatibility to children is not a smart move and only causes more stress. Any child should not have to worry about these things. Stop making bullying the only resort of escape for them.
Every parent wants their child to become successful and have everything they desire. However, there comes a time where you run after making your child the perfect human being forgetting that all they need is love and affection from you.
Children are a mirror version of their parents. Still, if you’re unhappy with yourself and happen to be afraid of projecting your insecurities that stem from past trauma onto your kids, you should check out kootenaybotanicals.com as it sells products that help with PTSD, depression, and anxiety. Become a better role model for your children to count on. Be the person you always needed when you were a child and give your kids the life you always envisioned.